I've been packing and preparing this past week, and finally getting excited to leave. Some friends of mine threw a little send off party for me, and the reality was starting to set in. I came home from the send off party and went to sleep, but I was awoken to an extremely sore throat at 4 in the morning. My heart sank. I got up, grabbed a COVID test and hoped for the best, but unfortunately, it came back positive. The last time this happened, I was getting excited to spend a weekend selling my art at Pitchfork, and COVID came for me then. It doesn't care what plans you may have. It comes at the worst times.
Luckily, my program is flexible and allowed me to push my entire residency back by one week. So my new dates are Feb 13 – March 13. In the end, this is a small setback, but in the moment it feels awful. I'm trying to find the silver linings. Right now it's tough, but I'm sure they are there.
A ton of feelings have been coming up. At first I was so mad. Mad at the universe for this awful timing, mad that despite its prevalence, COVID isn't getting the coverage it used to. It also feels embarrassing. It feels embarrassing to have plans "set in stone" for months, only to have them wrecked out of nowhere. I'm scared. I'm scared of having long COVID, or having brain fog during my residency– the time I want to be as clear headed as possible. And finally, I'm sad. I'm really sad for the part of me that was so excited to go and is instead bed ridden for who knows how long. At least my cats have been snuggly.
Maybe my next post will be about the silver linings. For now, I'm going to work on my t-shirt yarn rug and rest as much as possible.
I leave in less than a week for Puebla and it's time to start packing! What does one bring to Mexico for 1 month where they will be making art every day? My residency provides facilities, studios, and some equipment, but I am responsible for bringing or purchasing all of my materials. Naturally, I want to bring a little of everything, but I'll pare it down once I see how it all fits (or doesn't) in my suitcase.
I've been thinking about packing in 4 different categories: clothing, art supplies, lifestyle, and self care.
There is a laundromat nearby where I'll probably do my laundry once a week. I'm planning to bring enough clothes for 8-9 days knowing that. I've never been to Puebla, but it has a similar climate to Mexico City, where I have been several times. The temperature doesn't change much throughout the year, but in one day, there could be a 30º temperature difference. It's really important to have layers on hand for this reason.
My residency is not limited to any medium, and neither is my art. It takes on different shapes and mediums all the time. Above all else, I do love to draw. I'm planning to bring a lot of different sized sketchbooks, and all sorts of drawing utensils: pens, pencils, markers, crayons, pastels, and colored pencils. I'm also bringing a watercolor set, some brushes, and watercolor paper. I've recently loved making art with cut paper, so I'm bringing some of my colored paper and X-Acto + swivel knives. My project I'm hoping to work on deals with the topic of clothing, so I'd be remiss to not bring a few articles of clothing that could become art pieces. There is a printmaking studio at the facility in Puebla. I'm not planning to bring any of my printmaking supplies or inks, but purchase those in Mexico if I decide I want to focus on printmaking.
Aside from art supplies, I'll be bringing some cameras, my computer, iPad, and other digital tools I use day to day. I'm planning to bring a yoga mat so I can prioritize some exercise and stretching every day. I have a couple books packed that relate to my project topic, and a couple small art books that inspire me. I'm also bringing necessities such as: medicines, toiletries, etc. I've been getting into a great skincare routine over the past couple months, so I'm hoping to keep that up and be sure to wear lots of sunscreen when I'm there.
Since I'll be away from home for 5 weeks without my partner, cats, friends, etc. it's important to me to bring some items for self care and comfort. To remind me of home, I'm going to bring a couple nice photos of my partner and I and our cats. Phone pictures don't compare to having real ones in your space. I'm planning to bring some ginger chews and other things to soothe any stomach stuff that comes up. I'm bringing a small bottle of lavender essential oil to use at night to help me sleep, and some room spray, since candles and incense are not allowed. Smell is a really important sense to me, and can really help me feel at home.
This weekend I'll learn if all of this actually fits in my suitcase. Fingers crossed!
It's January 23, and I leave for Puebla, Mexico in 9 days to do a month-long artist residency with an organization called Arquetopia. I've known about this residency since early summer, and the time has finally arrived. It feels surreal. I truly don't know what to expect and haven't had much time to prepare. I'm going into this experience authentically with an open mind and open heart, ready to receive what is given to me, and ready to pour myself into the art.
A bit about the residency: In Puebla, I will be working on a self-guided project exploring themes of identity, queerness, and trauma alongside the guidance of a mentor. There will be other artists exploring their own projects at the same time. Each week I will meet with my mentor, do assigned readings, and participate in a cultural field trip. I also plan to soak up all that Puebla has to offer in my free time through the art, culture, music, nature, and food. Cannot wait to try some mole poblano!
A lot of feelings come up before I embark on this month long journey – excitement, fear, anxiety, and gratitude. I'm so grateful I gave myself this gift. I'm grateful I said "yes" to my art. I'm so grateful for my family and friends who surround me with support and excitement. Life is truly so short and it's all about making time for the things that matter most to you. It can be hard to do, but it feels so rewarding. I'm so excited to be in Mexico, escaping a month of Chicago's wintertime, surrounded by artists, and doing what I love most– making art.
A lot of anxiety comes up as well as I embark into something so unknown. I used to do this all the time in my early 20s– bouncing from one city, job, and apartment to another. I traveled much farther for much longer time, and didn't blink an eye. Yet something about finding so much stability in my life and uprooting it for a month feels jarring.
A lot of "What if's" come up…
"What if I'm too homesick and can't focus?"
"What if I get creative block and can't draw?"
"What if I can't seem to connect with the project I set out to work on?"
"What if my mentor doesn't like me?"
However, back in May, I asked myself a really important "what if" question:
"What if I went to Mexico for a month, by myself, to focus on my art?"
So after focusing on the negative "What if's" that inevitably come up, I made a new list of "what if's":
"What if I gave myself abundant permission to cherish each individual day in Puebla as is?"
"What if I love spending an indulgent amount of time with myself?"
"What if my project turns out to be more incredible than I could imagine or plan for in this moment?"
This residency comes at a time where I'm in my last year of my 20s, recently married, and recently have left corporate America to work for myself. It feels exceedingly important to invest this time and magic into myself.
